Sooooo I remember after my first BIG broken heart...when I finally got done crying my eyes out and feeling sorry for myself, I found this magnet that I stuck to the closet door in my room....
It said PRINCE WORTHY!!! Annnnd that became my little motto for myself! I said MARY you are WAITING this time and HOLDING out for a PRINCE!!! I mean, a real, true, gentleman!!! Annnnnd sooooo I began writing out my list of WHAT I wanted in my future husband and the list went on and on and on annnnnd on...VERY LONG and VERY detailed!
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THEN when I was FINALLY done writing out my list I looked at it, satisfied and pleased with myself...i had MY LIST of qualifications annnnnnd I was determined that I would NOT settle for ANYTHING LESS!!! THEN GOD impressed on my mind...
Are YOU the kind of WOMAN that a PRINCE would WANT to marry???
I was like, say WHAAAAAAT??? God impressed again on my mind, are YOU all those things that you have on your list for a future spouse? I'm like thinkin well, YES, I'm a really good girl, I obey my pastor, I'm faithful to church, I'm not doing anything bad annnnnd the conversation between me and God went something like this...
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God's like, Are you consistent? Welll...basically... Do YOU pray? I mean I could be better about it buuuut...Have you EVER read your Bible ALL the way through? I'm like GOD, did I mention that I pay my tithes??? ALL THE TIME!!! Annnnd NOT begrudgingly either!!! Annnnd God just KEPT getting on me...Hows your house-cleaning skills??? I'm like WEEEEELLLL...I'm really good at taking care of babies...MARY do you EVEN know where the broom in your house is? I know how to change diapers! When was the LAST time you washed a dish in your sink? Buuuuuut DIRTY dishes are GROSS...God's like GET OVER IT... I DO MY OWN LAUNDRY!!! Annnnnnnnnnd GOD, has ANYONE told you lately about WHAT an AMAZING cook I am??? God's like, OH YES, and speaking of FOOD...you could really stand to lose some weight!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT??? You mean i'm NOT all that and a bag of chips? God's like, NO your ALL that and TOO MANY BAGS OF CHIPS!!! Aaaaaahhhhh!!!! OMW!!! Like, ARE YOU SERIOUSLEY KIDDING ME??? God's just like, NO!
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I'm like OKAAAAAAAY, I get the point, as wonderful as I am...I'm not perfect annnnnd I STILL have some room for IMPROVEMENT!!!! Although, I must say, despite ALL my imperfections, I AM still pretty AWESOME!!! ;) And YES people, there was REALLY a time, IN MY ADULT life, that I didn't even know where the broom in our house was...NO JOKE...buuuuut just to for the record...me and the broom are VERY well acquainted now!!! ;D
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But what I think is that sometimes we are SOOOOO focused on what WE WANT and what WE DESERVE that we FORGET to stop and think about ourselves and HOW we are!!! We're soooo busy examining ALL of our potentials that we FORGET to examine our OWN SELF!!!
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"And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye."(Matthew 7:3-5)
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We think of this AMAZING person that we want to marry, buuuuuut WE forget to STOP and consider...
WHAT kind of a person, WOULD someone AMAZING want to marry???
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I've had some beautiful young lades say to me about certain young men, I just don't understand WHY he doesn't like me... and I just don't know what to say back without being rude...I'm just thinkin in my mind like Ummmm...OKAAAAAAY...do you want me to get you a mirror??? Annnnd I don't mean a PHYSICAL mirror, I mean a reflection of your heart!!! I'm just thinking like, Okaaaaaay, that guy has the call of God on his life and your still getting awards for being little miss drama queen!!! Like HELLO?!?! Your beautiful, buuuuut...???
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I remember one time, a long, long, LOOOOONG time ago, I had a guy friend that would always confide in me about girls annnnnnnd he was VERY PICKY!!! Sooooo this one time he was talking to me about two different girls, and one liked him but the other didn't, but the one that liked him was a little bit thicker then the girl that didn't like him...annnnnd I mean the girl that was a little bit bigger was NOT fat...its like the ONE girl was maybe a size 10 and the other girl was like a size 0!!! LOL!!!! He is just like, I mean, I'm kind of interested in the one girl, buuuuut its just that THE OTHER girl is just THINNER and I like that but I do kind of like the other one its just that the OTHER girl is just MORE attractive to me!
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Annnnd he is tellin me all this and in my mind i'm just thinking like, DUUUUUDE...I do NOT know what your being soooooo PICKY about...cuz you are NOT exactley Mr. McHottie yourself!!! Buuuuuuut...being the NICE person that I am I just rolled my eyes over the phone, said something like, well, you know looks aren't EVERYTHING and kept my thoughts about HIS looks to myself!!! LOL THEN the NEXT time him and I talked he tells me, yeah, I decided to go ahead and start talking to the girl that IS actually interested in me!!! I was like, OH really? What made you change your mind?! He says, Well, I talked to my pastor about it, and I was telling him the same thing I told you, and my pastor told me, Well, you know, its NOT like your really ALL THAT YOURSELF!!! When he said that to me I just BUSTED up laughing!!! He was like, WHAT?! I'm like, SORRY buuuuut that is EXACTLY what I was thinking...I'm just GLAD it was YOUR PASTOR that actually told you!!! AHAHAHAHAHA!!! I still crack up just thinkin about it!!!
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Sometimes we are sooooo busy LOOKING at other people, that we FORGET to STOP and TAKE a look in the mirror!!! I mean, I'm NOT saying to walk around and think oh I'm soooo ugly and I'm such a loser and Oh i'm not deserving of anyone!!! NO...thats NOT what I mean!!! What I mean is know your strengths, BUUUUT know your weaknesses as well and STRIVE to work on them and to change them!!! Strive to IMPROVE yourself, to be THE BEST person you can possibly be!!! I don't want to JUST be Mary!!! I want to be THE BEST MARY that I can POSSIBLY be!!! The BETTER person you are, THE BETTER person you will end up with!!! ASK YOURSELF...
AM I THE KIND OF PERSON, THAT I WOULD WANT TO MARRY???
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Just to clarify, i'm NOT talking about your personality, and OF COURSE there will be some things that vary on the male/female list simply cuz of our God-given roles, for example, I would want to marry someone that knows how to be a spiritual leader and provide for their family, ...OBVIOUSLEY a guy isn't going to have that on his list for what he wants in his wife...I HOPE!!!! AHAHAHAHA!!! BUUUUT what i'm REALLY talking about is YOUR CHARACTER!!! Does YOUR character reflect the kind of person you want to marry???Its really quite simple, you will ATTRACT to yourself the kind of person that YOU are!!! Shallow people ATTRACT SHALLOW PEOPLE!!! Carnal people ATTRACT CARNAL PEOPLE!!! SPIRITUAL PEOPLE ATTRACT SPIRITUAL PEOPLE!!!
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If you want to marry an AMAZING person, be an AMAZING PERSON!!! If you want to marry someone that LOVES their family, BE SOMEONE that LOVES your family!!! If you want to marry someone that LOVES the word of God, then YOU need to LOVE the word of God!!! If you want to marry a PRAYER WARRIOR, then YOU need to be a PRAYER WARRIOR!!! If you want to marry someone that LOVES SOULS, be a person that LOVES SOULS!!!
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I'm NOT saying throw out your list, KEEP your list of what you want in your future spouse. Think about it, write it ALL out, then take that list and use it as a check list for YOUR OWN LIFE!!! Strive to be a mirror image of your own list of expectations! Keep working on yourself until YOUR character reflects the kind of person YOU WOULD WANT TO MARRY!!!
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"For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass: For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straightway forgetteth what manner of man he was."
(1 James 23-24)
♥Mary Frances :)
