Friday, February 5, 2010

Leveticus...EW!!!

Okaaaaaaaaaay!!! Sooooooo I don't know where everyone is right now in their bible reading...but I happen to be in Leveticus. What a WEIRD book! I mean some of this stuff I am just like WHAT?! Like I know the whole thing with the sacrafices is for the pushing forward of sins and pointing to Calvary...But THEN Leveticus gets into the clean, and Unclean stuff and I am just like OMW!!! Read this from Leveticus 13

And in the place of the boil there be a white rising, or a bright spot, white, and somewhat reddish, and it be shewed to the priest;  And if, when the priest seeth it, behold, it [be] in sight lower than the skin, and the hair thereof be turned white; the priest shall pronounce him unclean:

I'm just like WHAT?!?! Can you imagine having to do that?!
Let me put this to you in modern day English...
Close your eyes and imagine...
(Well don't really close your eyes cause then you can't read this!)
.
It's a typical Sunday morning after service when you head over to greet your pastor...

"Hey Pastor! That was a good message!"
"Thank you Mary!" then he starts walking away.
"Wait! Wait! Bro. Abbott, I just had something I wanted to ask you."
Pastor turns back, "Yes, Mary, So which guy NOW is it that you want me to get to preach over here?"
"Oh no, no! Bro. Abbott, it's not EVEN about a guy this time!"
Pastor looks SHOCKED!
"See I like have this sore, on my face and like in the middle of the sore, there is like, this hair and like I was just wondering if you could look at the hair and tell me what color it is...black, white or yellow?!
Pastor takes out his glasses...squints..clears his throat...
"Uh, I'm sorry Mary, I'm not sure WHAT color that hair is but THATS NASTY girl!
 Please do NOT come back to church until that thing is GONE!!!"
.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Heeeeeeeeeeey you guys thats BIBLE right there!!!
Leveticus 13...Go  read it for yourselves if ya don't believe me!!!