So the other day Jestina, Esther and I were swimming and the two girls were jumping in off the diving board. All of the sudden I just had this urge to jump but I havn't jumped in like years cause I am like SERIOUSLEY scared about it!!! So I get outta the pool and head to the board. The girls are like, what are you doing?! I am like "I'm gonna jump!" and they start screaming!!! LOL but when I step up on the board I get sooooooooo FREAKED out!!! I am like NOOOOOOOOOO I can't!!! They are like oh come on Mary PLEASE!!!! Please jump!!! They are like beggin me but I just can't get up the nerve to ACTUALLY jump off!!! They are like just think your man is in the pool waiting to catch you!!! I am like okaaaaaaaay thats NOT working!!! HAHAHA!!! They are like beggin me to jump and Esther is standing there holding my hand sayin I'll jump with you and I am just like I CAN'T!!! They are like EVERYONE we know jumps off the diving board!!! So I am like well it's cause I'm white, thats why I am sooooo scared!!! They are like THATS RIGHT!!! If you were black you would jump off...uhhuh!!! Then, they teasingly start taunting me; White girl! White girl! White girl!!! HAHAHA!!! I am like soooooooo laughing now!!! Finally I like look over at Esther and I say; If I jump what am I gonna get from you?! She knows what I am talkin about...she thinks about it cause she knows there is only one thing I really want and thats for her to live for God....She says, I am gonna try Mary and at least while I am at your house I will dress right...I know that if I jump it doesn't mean that she will actually hold true but I want to prove to her just how important it is to me that she lives for God!!! So despite the fact that I am still TOTALLY scared...I think about my girl and then I JUMP!!! I go all the way to the bottom of the pool and up!!! When I break up of the surface the girls are screaming and laughing hysterically!!! Esther is like, Snow! Snow!!! SNOW!!! I am like WHAT?! She is like you went all the way down and it just looked like there was snow at the bottom of the pool!!! HAHAHA!!!
I was like REALLY proud of myself! I did it five more times that day and three times yesturday. Its weird cause every time I get on the board I am still scared, but every time I still jump!!! I think sometimes that the only thing that makes us conqueror our fears is LOVE!!! :)